It can be such a blow to your ego to lose your job ... even (and sometimes, especially) when you felt trapped by your work.
There can be such a stigma to being laid off, down-sized or terminated. Historically people who got fired were people who were not very good at what they did. When we are terminated, we carry with us so many judgments of not being good enough or worse, the outcast.
Recently, with the market in a tumble, two friends secretly confided in me that they had been terminated. They didn't want anyone to know. Interestingly, they know each other ... and neither knows the other is out of work.
It is so stressful simply not to have work ... and then, adding the pressure of keeping it hidden can over burden an already taxed nervous system. Perhaps, for various reasons, you need to keep it hush-hush. But, please be compassionate to yourself. Make sure you surround yourself with people who can support you and nourish your spirit.
And, be ready, you might find yourself very tired. Or, conversely, hyper focused. My invitation. Take time for you. Be careful you don't nap your way into a downward spiral of despair. At the same time, be careful not to busy yourself into such a state of denial that you don't take time to assess what you really want.
For today... pamper yourself with a hot bath, a good movie or just time with friends.
...
Sunday, March 1, 2009
DAY 9: The Naked Truth: People are the gateway to your dream!
Before we enter the next phase ...
What was it like to acknowledge others?
What happened when you let yourself act without the filter of life's typical ‘politeness’ and connected with someone for real?
Acknowledging others is truly a fabulous gift of recognition and appreciation. The impact is undeniably powerful. And yet, people are so hesitant to do so.
I learned at a very young age the impact of not connecting. As a child of a military family we were constantly on the move. If you didn't reach out, you could easily go unseen and lost within the maze of life.
By high school, these moves began to take their toll on me. For years I was one of those kids at the back of the school, leaning against the cold brick wall, sucking deeply on their cigarettes and avoiding eye contact? As a shy kid, I found this much easier than trying to fit in. All the other kids seemed so 'in' with someone. It just felt safer to stay hidden.
And then, during one summer break from college, I worked as a waitress in Ocean City with a few close friends. Between the thrill of riding the surf, college antics and the tourist intrigue, life finally began! Everywhere I went, there were new people ready for fun.
At the restaurant, it didn't take much to make a fun connection. A question about my customer's day would ignite stories about their family. A comment about their appetite would start a wrestling match of friendly jabs. They would come back and ask for me, again and again.
And, the great part: my tips soared!
I quickly realized that people were craving connection. It didn't matter whether they were alone or in a group (well, except for some couples)—what really made their night was when I took the time to be curious and really connect with them.
So, let's take another day to acknowledging people.
Why?
People are the gateway to your dream—not just because you need the job, but because you connect out of curiosity and life delight.
As you begin to create your 'dream list,' it will be key that you can relate to others, truly see them, and feel their needs. So, before a job is on the line, practice connecting today.
If your work seems like too intimidating a place to practice, take a field trip to a new store. Strangers make great guinea pigs. They will never see you again, so don't be timid. You might just find that by validating them, you will believe more fully in yourself.
And for those of you who'd like inspiration on the power of validation, I invite you to check out this short film. It's about 15 minutes long. http://www.flixxy.com/validation-short-film.htm?a=0
What was it like to acknowledge others?
What happened when you let yourself act without the filter of life's typical ‘politeness’ and connected with someone for real?
Acknowledging others is truly a fabulous gift of recognition and appreciation. The impact is undeniably powerful. And yet, people are so hesitant to do so.
I learned at a very young age the impact of not connecting. As a child of a military family we were constantly on the move. If you didn't reach out, you could easily go unseen and lost within the maze of life.
By high school, these moves began to take their toll on me. For years I was one of those kids at the back of the school, leaning against the cold brick wall, sucking deeply on their cigarettes and avoiding eye contact? As a shy kid, I found this much easier than trying to fit in. All the other kids seemed so 'in' with someone. It just felt safer to stay hidden.
And then, during one summer break from college, I worked as a waitress in Ocean City with a few close friends. Between the thrill of riding the surf, college antics and the tourist intrigue, life finally began! Everywhere I went, there were new people ready for fun.
At the restaurant, it didn't take much to make a fun connection. A question about my customer's day would ignite stories about their family. A comment about their appetite would start a wrestling match of friendly jabs. They would come back and ask for me, again and again.
And, the great part: my tips soared!
I quickly realized that people were craving connection. It didn't matter whether they were alone or in a group (well, except for some couples)—what really made their night was when I took the time to be curious and really connect with them.
So, let's take another day to acknowledging people.
Why?
People are the gateway to your dream—not just because you need the job, but because you connect out of curiosity and life delight.
As you begin to create your 'dream list,' it will be key that you can relate to others, truly see them, and feel their needs. So, before a job is on the line, practice connecting today.
If your work seems like too intimidating a place to practice, take a field trip to a new store. Strangers make great guinea pigs. They will never see you again, so don't be timid. You might just find that by validating them, you will believe more fully in yourself.
And for those of you who'd like inspiration on the power of validation, I invite you to check out this short film. It's about 15 minutes long. http://www.flixxy.com/validation-short-film.htm?a=0
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